Posted by: thinningtheherd | August 3, 2010

#94 Brett Favre


Species Name:  Selfinvolvicus Dickingaroundius

UPDATE: Breaking news from the farm, as Brett Favre told ESPN that he plans on coming back to the Vikings if he’s healthy.  This of course after the Vikings upped their offer to the veteran QB from 13 to 20 mil for a one year contract.  You’re a clever one, Brett, and we all know when you say this isn’t about money…it’s DEFINITELY about money.

While we all await the official decision as to whether Brett Favre will haul his old bones back to the gridiron, part of me, check that, all of me, hopes the last pass of his career will remain the interception by my Saints that paved the way for them to win their first Super Bowl in franchise history.

With NFL training camps now underway, the most recent report out of Hattiesburg, Mississippi is that Favre is going to retire…for the third time.  Will the third time be a charm?  Who the fuck the cares.  What pisses me off is that Favre has dicked Brad Childress and the entire Vikings organization around all summer because he needed to play the part of the perennial drama queen.  If the reports are true, and Favre plans on holding a press conference where he’ll undoubtedly weep like he just got done watching Beaches, he’s put the Vikings in quite a pickle.

While the Vikings management have been anxiously awaiting an answer from Favre, they could’ve been actively pursuing a suitable replacement instead of settling between Tavaris Jackson and Sage Rosenfels, both average quarterbacks at best.

Although Brett Favre proved last season that he still has the mojo to be one of the elite quarterbacks in the NFL, his incessant need to be the fucking center of attention every off-season has gotten beyond tiresome.  Don’t get your Wranglers all in a bunch and make a goddamn decision already!

In a world where Brett Favre didn’t exist to toy with everyone’s emotions:

  • No one would know any of the names of the Vikings’ receivers with Tavaris Jackson throwing the ball.
  • Packers QB, Aaron Rodgers, could live in his own shadow instead of Favre’s.
  • We wouldn’t have to witness Favre coming out of retirement for a 7th time complete with a new bionic skeleton at the age of 50.  The Hyundai commercials might not be far off:
  • We wouldn’t have witnessed the first grandfather quarterback in the NFL, and don’t you think that’s the way it should be?
  • The Saints would still have won Super Bowl XLIV.

I realize that Brett Favre is a pretty great human being, and the whole thing with his father dying and gathering up the courage to play that very next week, blah, blah, blah, yeah it was admirable.  But come on, how many times can this guy jerk everyone around with this retirement bullshit until we say enough is enough.  I realize you love the game Brett, but believe it or not, the world doesn’t just revolve around you.

But one has to have dreams right?

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