Posted by: thinningtheherd | April 21, 2010

#72 Pharmaceutical Companies

Species Name:  Misleadicus Moneygrubbicus

There have been many important advances in the world of medicine over the last hundred years and these pharmaceutical companies are responsible for a lot of them, but when I want to help control my allergies, I don’t also want to have to worry about rectal bleeding or hemorrhaging blood out of my eyeballs.  You know exactly what I’m talking about, when you’re watching TV and one of those commercials come on for Allegra, Boniva, or even boner strengthening Levitra.  These drugs show people feeling sweet relief when they take whatever pill the commercial is hocking, but they don’t show the possible diarrhea and difficulty breathing that is to follow.

Now, I realize that every drug has potential side effects, but doesn’t seem a little ridiculous that the “potential” side effects sound a hundred times worse than the actual ailment you are suffering from.  How about these pharmaceutical companies perfect Celebrex so that when I take it to relieve my arthritis, I don’t have to worry about DEATH as a fucking side effect?!?!

In a world where Pharmacuetical Companies weren’t trying to kill while simultaneously helping us:

  • Old men everywhere wouldn’t have to worry about potential permanent blindness when taking Cialis, or any other erectile dysfunction drug,  just so they can have a 4 hour lasting hard-on.
  • People wouldn’t have to worry about developing cancer from taking the arthritis “relieving” drug, Enbrel.
  • Lunesta, due to it’s dependency forming qualities, wouldn’t become the newest drug on the street.  “Hey man!  Let me get one of those Lunesta’s, I’m dying for a fix, I need to sleep man!”
  • People taking Paxil for depression, wouldn’t have to worry about the potential side effect of suicide.  They’re fucking depressed and your drug to help their manic thoughts will actually make them more likely to kill themselves?! What the fuck?!!?
  • People who take the blood thinner, Plavix, wouldn’t have to worry about their blood thinning and coming out of every orifice in their body.
  • People with arthritis should probably just kill themselves, because any drug they do take is going to anyway.

Kind of ridiculous right?  Not to mention that these pharmaceutical companies are going to financially rape you to get these drugs that are supposed to help you, but in the process seem to be thinning you from the herd.  Maybe it’s time to pay your local Chinese herbal medicine doctor a visit?  Let’s hope Obama and his healthcare “death panels” can rectify this situation and put more stringent restrictions on these pharmaceutical companies and keep them from exploiting the pain these ailment sufferers are experiencing.  Assholes.

But one has to have dreams right?



  1. Dude you are so right! These fuckheads are selfish money grubbing assholes! They need to put restrictions on direct marketing. That is the only way retarded people will stop thinking they need all this shit. Wow…I’m pissed! Fuck Drugs!! “Down with Dope up with Hope!”

    P.S. You need to thin the Canuck fans from the Herd. They are such whinny little bitches.

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