Posted by: thinningtheherd | September 14, 2009

#2 Kanye West

Seriously?  Jesus Christ is your "Alter Ego?"

Seriously? Jesus Christ is your "Alter Ego?"

Species Name: Egotisticus Overratedis

No one should be too surprised at Kanye West’s outburst at the MTV Video Music Awards…he’s a prick. And really Kanye? “One of the greatest videos of all time?” Really? I mean sure, Beyonce looks good and all shaking her booty for four minutes, but I think you can even tell by her face at the VMA’s that she doesn’t even think its one of the greatest videos of all time. For those who didn’t get a chance to see the debacle…here it is for your viewing glory albeit terrible quality because Viacom was quick to pull almost every clip from the internet (dbags):

With his debut release of College Dropout in 2004, Kanye West was instantly hailed as a musical genius, and the asshole’s persona spread faster than Amy Winehouse’s chlamydia. From there it was all downhill. Ever since, people have been constantly feeding this blowhards ego til it has now become the size of Rosie O’Donnell’s head. Everyone was moved by Kanye’s story, having been involved in a near fatal car crash in 2002 that required his jaw to be wired shut for a period of time…if only it had stayed wired shut permanently. Most people, after a near death experience, become humbled and take their second opportunity at life as a way to “make good.” Kanye on the other hand has spent the last five years spouting off one idiotic sound byte after another, and being an egotistical, ungrateful, pompous dickhead. Now its time for you to be thinned from the herd.

In a world where Kanye West is only performing in Hell:

  • People could accept awards without fear that a crazy person is going to rip the mic out of their hands.
  • Jamie Foxx will officially be awarded the title of “Black Artist with the Biggest Ego.”
  • The VD epidemic amongst gay fish will finally come to an end.
  • People will realize how retarded shutter shades are and that not even Kanye could pull them off.
  • Mike Myers could stop seeing his therapist.
  • The word “genius” would go back to being reserved for ACTUAL geniuses like Stephen Hawkings or Albert Einstein.
  • The production quality of hip hop music will suffer, but everyone will realize that the pros far outweigh the cons of Kanye’s ceasing to exist and make due with average “beats.”
  • Rappers will continue comparing themselves to Jesus Christ…but not actually believe they are the second coming of JC…unlike Kanye (see above picture).
  • Kanye will not have made as great an impact to popular music as he self-deluded himself into believing.
  • Taylor Swift will piss on his grave while exclaiming, “karma’s a bitch ain’t it?”

Ah yes, a world without Kanye West and his inflated sense of self importance sounds pretty amazing. Unfortunately, this assclown has a large enough following of mindless zombies that revel every time the guy does anything controversial that we will have to endure plenty of more moronic behavior from Kanye West. After his latest stunt, Kanye’s next album, will wind up going twelve times platinum, the critics will deem him greater than Michael Jackson, Elvis Presley and The Beatles combined, and his “All Hail Kanye West Because He’s a Fucking Genius Tour” will sell out every show. ::sigh::

But one has to have dreams right?



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Nice pink sweater...tool.


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